Senior Health Issues

This is a public service announcement from the school of hard knocks, to protect those who may have made the same assumptions I did.


We were more than thrilled when my parents were accepted into a senior citizen village that looked more like a campus than an old folks home, and offered all three levels of care, Independent Living, Assisted Living, and Skilled Nursing.  Naively, I thought our prayers had been answered:  not only was there such a wonderful place for Mom and Dad, but they would never have to move again, at least not outside the village.

Well, my eyes are open now.  Assisted Living and Skilled Nursing facilities are for seniors with physical challenges, while doing virtually nothing for mentally-challenged patients.  Although the cost difference between Independent Living apartments and Assisted Living rooms is about double, there is virtually no help for mentally-challenged patients.

My Mom has had several minor strokes and TMI's, and is not the person she was before the strokes.  She can barely carry on a conversation, and has virtually no drive or initiative.  Although she is now moving into an Assisted Living room, we have been told directly that they do not force anyone to do anything, but can only 'strongly suggest.'  This includes eating, drinking, changing clothes, you get the picture.  Now you are thinking, "What, you expected they would force her to eat and drink, might even give her an IV or put a tube down her throat?!" 

So now what do we do?  To be truthful, I hadn't thought this far ahead, until now.  I'm all for prescribing anti-depressants, but so far they haven't really made a difference.  It's really horrible to see the quality of life drain away from someone, especially one's parents.

My point is, naive or wishful thinking or whatever, everyone should know this ahead of time, and be prepared to deal with this issue, rather than assume, as I did.